How To Get What You Want: A Lesson In Putting Yourself First

by Felice Dunas

As women, we’re socialized that expecting our needs to be met is unreasonable. That getting what we want isn’t playing fair. That our role is the peacekeeper and it’s our responsibility to manage the feelings and experiences of those around us.

You’re so aggressive.
Why are you being so demanding?
I don’t like working with her, she’s bossy.
We need you to be less abrasive.
You should smile more
Ugh, you’re such a b….

Sound familiar?

We’re expected to be more compassionate and nurturing. We’re expected to be more sensitive and in-tune with our feelings. We’re expected to bear the emotional load of the relationship.

And what we’re not expected to do?

Ask for - and expect to receive - what we want.

Men don’t have this problem. They’re socialized to expect that they will get what they want. It’s a non-question. They want to achieve something - they’re raised with the expectation that it’s possible.

And we make backup plans.

But what if there was a way to become the woman who simply expects to get what she wants?

What if you COULD expect that you will be pleased - in relationships, in life, and in the bedroom?

We’re Socialized To Settle For What We Get

We see this all the time. We settle for someone who doesn’t make us truly happy - who doesn’t fulfill our very real and very valid needs - because we’ve been trained not to expect to be pleased.

We’ve been trained that we’re the ones to give and compromise in relationships, with sex, at work - so our needs become secondary to the demands of others.

Which results in us settling for relationships that don’t satisfy us - in and out of the bedroom.

See, when we’re sexually satisfied - when we’re in touch with the sexuality that lives at the very core of our being - we develop a sense of self-confidence that’s different from every other kind.

Sexual self-confidence is the understanding that you are a woman deserving of pleasure, and you are a woman who deserves to be pleased.

When you’re able to tap into your own pleasure and take control of your own satisfaction and help your partner do the same…

Your standards increase for your romantic and sexual relationships.

Can you imagine having the self-confidence and self-esteem to STOP “taking what you can get” and to begin expecting (and getting) better from your partner?

Imagine feeling empowered to tell him what feels good - and to rightfully expect him to make that happen for you.

Imagine being self-assured enough to show him what turns you on… and to allow yourself to participate in your own seduction.

Imagine having a sex life that’s so good that it genuinely improves the relationship between you and your partner… not just while you’re in the bedroom, but in its entirety.

The way you feel about him. How attracted you are to him. The intimacy and closeness you feel with him. How much fun you have with him. How much joy he brings to your life.

All of that is possible when you focus on yourself and your own sexual pleasure.

But it starts with choosing someone who will participate as fully in your pleasure as you do.

Your Sexual Satisfaction Begins With Partner Selection

In a study published in January 2022, the single-most consistent indicator of sexual satisfaction was satisfaction within the relationship.

Which means the more satisfied with your relationship you are - the more satisfied sexually you are.

And the higher your sexual self-esteem… the more discerning you’ll be when it comes to partner selection, and your relationship will be stronger and more fulfilling.

Which means your ability to understand and control your sexual pleasure will ultimately lead to a better relationship… which will lead to higher sexual satisfaction.

It’s a continually improving cycle that starts with YOU understanding yourself and what makes you feel good.

It starts with YOU putting yourself first, understanding what you want, and having the knowledge and tools to go find it.

Think about it: you’re no longer simply looking for “someone.” You’re looking for someone who fulfills your needs. Because you’re in touch with who you are inside and what will please you… you now have more information about who you’re searching for… because he needs to fill those needs.

All too often, women rely on “butterflies” or “chemistry” to choose their romantic and sexual patners… but what if you had the confidence to look for MORE than that?

What if you had the confidence to know what matters most to you and choose a partner based on that set of criteria? What if you could hold your partner to a high standard throughout your marriage?

What if you had the physical, emotional, and psychological knowledge to understand what you’re looking for and make it happen for yourself?

Can you imagine anything more empowering? Can you imagine anything more liberating from the “put yourself second” socialization that we’ve experienced our entire lives?

In my experience, there is nothing more liberating and transformative than helping women get in touch with their own inner sexuality, their own ability to experience pleasure, and their sexual self-esteem.

How To Get What You Want So You’re Sexually Satisfied

Women have long had very few options to learn about their sexual pleasure and satisfaction.

Most sexual entertainment (like porn) is undoubtedly created to appeal to the male gaze and with male pleasure in mind… and women are rarely considered. Certainly not catered to.

And sexual education is designed to teach girls about reproduction- not satisfaction or pleasure.

Talking to your mom or family can be awkward at best… and will leave you with many wrong or outdated emotional and psychological theories and stories about sex.

And your friends or peers… they all have the same issues. So they’re not a reliable source of information either.

Which means you’re stuck fumbling around, trying to figure it out, wondering if you’re even doing it right…

And the longer you struggle, the more frustrated you get trying to understand your body and yourself in a way that will give you a head start.

You might even give up entirely, thinking that this sort of knowledge is unattainable because “women are so different” and there isn’t one, solid, reliable source of information that will tell you what you need to know and still give you the freedom to be you.

Until now.

You don’t have to fumble through life trying to find out what works for you, your body, your desires, or your preferences.

You don’t have to wonder if there’s more to it that you’re just not understanding…

I’ve used my understanding of behavior, the human body, and Ancient Principles to enhance the lives of individuals, couples, families, and corporate executives, for nearly forty years.

I have experience that would take you a literal lifetime to have.

And I don’t want you to suffer because you simply haven’t been able to learn what I’ve learned.

I don’t want you to have to wonder where you’re going to learn yourself in a way that will let you find your sexual satisfaction… so you can build your sexual self esteem and:

• Be more satisfied in your relationship
• Be more discerning about your partners
• Improve your relationships with family and friends
• See more success at work
• Feel more comfortable in your skin
• Have good days more often
• And transform your life in its entirety.

The results of improving your sex life - of tapping into your sexuality - of having the physical, emotional, and psychological tools you need to have better sex…

They’re staggering.

You will see your entire life change… all because you’ve taken charge of your pleasure.

In this life-changing program, I’ve distilled 30+ years of experience - working with women of all walks of life, helping them harness their sexuality, and improving their sex lives (and their relationships.)

I’ve created the guide you as a woman need but have never had.

The one that will show you how your body works… how your brain works… how your emotions work… AND how to overcome barriers that keep you from having great sex.

In this self-study program, I’ve carefully and thoughtfully compiled lessons on everything from the physical knowledge you need to the emotional barriers to overcome to the skills you’ll enjoy learning and practicing to give you my entire life’s work on awakening your sexuality and using it to transform your life.

I’ll show you:

• How your body remembers your past (even when you don’t) and exactly how it’s affecting your every experience now… because when you understand where obstacles come from, you’re more able to overcome them…
• The physical introduction you never had to your anatomy - from your vulva to your vagina (and all the little places in between)… INCLUDING what the function of each part of your genitals is for and how it can help you have consistently better sex…
• A full breakdown of the health benefits of sex and how you can increase those benefits with every single sexual encounter (whether or not you have a partner)…

• How attraction is both evolutionary and determined by your life experiences so you can consciously hold your partners to a higher standard…
• The difference between your sex life and your sexuality… and how one influences the other so drastically that it’s impossible not to connect the two…
• My must-watch Thrusting Tutorial that will show you how different movements affect the nerves in your vagina… so you have almost a step-by-step tutorial to heighten your pleasure and direct your partner (or use yourself) to feel good every time…
• The process of seduction and how to become an active participant in your own seduction… which heightens the entire experience AND allows you to retain control over your sexual satisfaction…
• The science behind the orgasm so it’s no longer a magical, mystical thing but a process that you can discover and repeat, reliably, every single time… because The Elusive O is a thing of the past…
• The essential part to your sexual self-care that you might be avoiding - and how you can make sure you’re always healthy, sexually and physically…
• And much, much more.

THIS is the program we, as women, have been missing. THIS is the program designed to help you finally put your needs first and to have a relationship that fulfills you in every possible way.

Because remember - when you’re satisfied sexually, you create a better, more connected, more joyous relationship… and when you’re satisfied in your relationship, your sexual satisfaction increases.

Whether you want to improve your relationship or you’re looking for a new one… being equipped to understand, communicate, and participate in your sexual needs is a foundation that will dramatically affect that relationship’s outcome.

That’s what this program is designed to help you achieve…

And along the way, you’ll discover how to begin putting yourself FIRST in a healthy way that will only do good things for your entire life.

I can’t wait to help you get there,

Warmly,

P.S. As important as sexual satisfaction is… if there are other issues with who you’re choosing as your long-term partner… you’re going to still struggle with finding the fulfilling relationship you truly want.

If you’re not fulfilled emotionally in your relationships - if you find yourself choosing the wrong long-term or life partner and struggle to understand WHY you’re stuck on the “ meeting-excitement-fizzle-look again” cycle that is frankly wearing you out and killing your belief in love…

Then I encourage you to try The Soulmate Method - a program about the OTHER HALF of finding and building a healthy, fulfilling long-term relationship.